In a time and place full of intimidating diagnoses, politically driven agendas, judge-y mom groups, social media, trigger warnings left and right, and the Target checkout lady saying “sleep while you can,” it’s so hard to know where to turn to for advice after you find out that you’re pregnant.
With all this happening around us, the transition to motherhood sometimes feels more like a loss than the most joyous and monumental moment of our lives. It’s okay to feel alone and lost. Truthfully, we are saying goodbye to the only version of ourselves that we’ve ever known: the maiden. We really won’t ever be the same. But what if that’s exactly what it’s supposed to be like? It’s okay to mourn our old selves in this season. To realize that we are closing the door on the life we had before… but what’s next?
The People Around Us Can Certainly Affect Our Pregnancy
What if we start looking at the pregnancy journey and the transition to motherhood a little differently than our society does? It all starts with who and what we surround ourselves with. Today’s world is muddled with materials, opinions, and options when it comes to pregnancy, so who we choose to be in our circle is most important. Have you ever heard the saying, “You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with?” Who you choose to be around and listen to are the people who have the most influence in your life. And at a time when you are most vulnerable, keep your birth team and circle tight. Have a circle that supports, empowers, and encourages you in all your choices during your pregnancy.
Did you know that when an elephant gives birth, other female elephants will surround her? It’s fascinating. 40 tons of elephants in the wild kicking up dirt, making loud noises, and warning other predators and attackers that they will not get to their sister while she is the most vulnerable. It’s beautiful. What’s even more special is when the baby elephant is born, the sister elephants will cover him with dirt and sound their trumpets obnoxiously loud; encouraging and cheering their sister on as they share with the entire animal kingdom the event that just took place.
This! This is what it should be like when other women are going through their perinatal season of life. Whether it’s a season of fertility, pregnancy, or postpartum, we should never stop encouraging one another.
Your Powerful Inner “Mom Gut”: Trust It!
To the expectant mother at the heart of it all: remember your inherent strength. Trust in your “mom gut” and know that you are the best advocate for your child. You have the authority to make decisions that are right for both of you. It’s perfectly acceptable to step away from external noise and seek resources that align with your unique needs. Trust your instincts; they are your most powerful guide.
Our babies are hitchhikers on our nervous systems, so whatever we are feeling, so are they, which is why it’s important that we are their #1 protector.
We do this best when our nervous systems are adaptable to the stressors around us that we can’t necessarily control. We should be able to sprint across the street but then sit down and have a relaxing and digestible lunch right after. That’s how adaptable and resilient we are.
Today, I pray that you step into motherhood with confidence, fully aware that you are the perfect mom for your baby. Embrace this role with grace, understanding that perfection is not the goal. You have the right to evolve, change providers, and alter your path. Your body is a vessel of incredible strength, chosen to nurture and love this precious life. Embrace this transition, for you are embarking on a journey that is uniquely yours.